What? No Usher?
First day of STC Summit at opening session I was surprised by the ginormous stage stuff. I was all, "Yay! Usher's playin'!" But alas, no Usher. With some sort of mix up, the opening speaker, Molly E. Holzschlag (@mollydotcom), didn't appear. Doing what anybody in that situation would have done without access to Usher, they broke out the business meeting. Cold, hard pie charts followed by excitement of certification vagueness. There were chills in the room.
Other hastily prepared presentations proliferated the platform pimping products and placating the people with promises of improvement and partnerships. Indeed the awesomeness of the opening session gave me these take aways:
- OH: If you are at the STC Summit and you need to be introduced to Twitter, you may not need to actually be at the STC summit.
- OH: Who are you people and why am I listening to this?
- OH: Where is Usher?
- OH: Does anyone understand that Adobe guy? Anyone? Anyone at all? Bueller?
More disorganization followed by a general lack of interest in nutty trail mix or chips with exotic dips. Decisions were made and lives were lost, we decided on the Ginger Man. Only about 2.5 miles from the hotel. And by "we" I mean:
@chris_oh, @whitneyhess, @antdavey, @rachelhpeters, @afox98, @willsansbury, @Paul_UserAid, @techcommdood, @AngelosTzelepis, @KristinKirkham, @Ninety7, and @kirstyt
First of all these are brilliant people. My intellect was stone frozen from fear and disguised itself stoic aloofness. Lots of STC business was gotten down:
- OH: When people just ask me where I'm from, I just pull up my shirt.
- OH: When you think Southern Baptists, think Amway Convention gone horribly wrong
- OH: 127 Southpark references
- Witnessed beer splatter patterns across the table
- Important note: My 40-year-oldness is not a snazzy as @AngelosTzelepis, who is a golden god
Conclusion:
All penis jokes were not entirely any one person's fault since the conference is being held in the Dallas Phallic Memorial Tower a.k.a Reunion Tower.
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Unrest by Parkway Drive
Dude, go to bed.
Also… LIBLFMAO
[Reply]
I got more excited at an Amway convention, because at least they have live singing (to tracks). Still, the Adobe guy notwithstanding, I liked the info about certification and the long drawn-out explanation of the Bureau of Labor & Statistics entry for Technical Writer. Unfortunately, I'm a Canadian and found the entire presentation U.S. focused. No offense to my state-side bros & sisses, but a loud outpouring from the leadership day hashtag (another #fauxpas) was "there is no STC National, or STC International—STC is a global organization!" Didn't seem like it from where I stood.
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